Stephanie Morrill

Dealing with Change

3 November 2009

In high school, I truly believed that by now I would have this life thing “figured out.” I thought I’d know how to do my hair (nope – just getting better at disguising the fact), how to best organize my time, and how I felt about all the important issues.

For a while now, particularly the first year of McKenna’s life, I spent a lot of time panicking because I DON’T HAVE THINGS FIGURED OUT. Not only that, but I couldn’t see any hope of figuring them out. Every time I’d settle on a new cleaning or cooking schedule, it would get thrown off. Or I’d read something that would make me think differently about an issue I thought I’d settled in my mind.

And then I started having coffee once a week with my friend Debbie. Debbie has daughters my age, so she’s not only a fabulous friend, she’s a mentor as well. Debbie left for South Africa today. Three months ago, she thought she’d live in Kansas City until her husband retired. Now she’ll be in Pretoria for 2 years. During our coffee times these last months, as I watched Debbie roll with the unexpected change in her life, I was struck anew by something my husband has been telling me for years—It’s okay to not have everything figured out. You’re not supposed to.

A better plan, the only one that will actually work, is to do everything to the best of my abilities and trust God to do the rest. It’s a hard plan—it was a lot easier to make my cleaning schedules every couple months. But as I come to terms with the fact that I won’t have life figured out in 10, 20, or even 90 years, I realize it’s the only plan I’ll ever be completely satisfied with.

Hope everyone has a great day!

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